Former New York Yankee catcher and
manager Berra was 90. He was inducted into the baseball industry's
“Hall of Fame.” He was also a part of ten so-called World Series
Championships won by the team. (Only U.S. teams that are part of the
cartel named Major League Baseball are actually allowed to compete
for the series, so “World” is simply false.)
Who couldn't like Yogi Berra? A
charming clown who was catnip for sportswriters, Berra, a former
catcher and later manager in baseball, was given to utterances that
amused by being blindingly obvious or displaying a fractured logic.
Let's revisit some of Berra's funny
utterances that were made into memorable sayings by media repetition:
“You can observe a lot by just
watching.” -Can't argue with that.
“If you come to a folk in the road,
take it.” -Uhh, could you be more specific?
“Baseball is ninety percent mental and the other half is physical.” -Well, math wasn't his strong point. Let's grant that.
“You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six.” -Okay, ratios are confusing to the math-challenged.
“I usually take a two-hour nap from one to four.” -Like I said, weak on math. On basic arithmetic, come to think of it.
“We have deep depth.” -That's the best kind of depth, too.
“You've got to be very careful if you don't know where you are going, because you might not get there.” -Kinda true, in a Mobius-strip-logic sort of way.
“Pair up in threes.” -He did have his own concept of math, remember.
“Even Napoleon had his Watergate.” -Indeed. Funny thing, that.
“I don't know (if they were men or women fans running naked across the field). They had bags over their heads.” -He shoulda tooken* his own advice and just watched them to observe a lot. (*Yeah, I channeled a bit of Yogi's penchant for grammatical malapropism there.)
“Why buy good luggage, you only use it when you travel.” -I don't see anything wrong with that one, actually. If by “good” one means overpriced brand-name luggage.
“It's like déjà vu all over again.” -No list of Yogisms is complete without that masterpiece of redundancy. Or complete until it's finished. But what if the déjà vu you experienced was of a previous episode of déjà vu? A mental roomful of mirrors? It'd be like you're seeing yourself seeing yourself, if you get what I mean. You can't look in a mirror without a mirror.
But
this next one makes me wonder if our oh-so-trustworthy establishment
media might have made up a few of “Yogi's” utterances, or at least
“perfected” them:
“I never said most of the things I said.” -Clearly he was grammatically challenged. Read that as “the things attributed to me,” and it makes perfect sense, of course. [ESPN has posted a video with a talking head insisting that Berra did so say the things he denied saying. Is this a case of the media protesting too much?]
Berra
could almost seem like a wise
fool. Another character whose existence as a media character, Casey
Stengel, another media-concocted character, similarly came across as
an offbeat player/baseball figure who was innately likable and
charmingly idiosyncratic. [Stengel had some things to say about
Berra, such as "He'd fall in a sewer and come up with a gold watch."
Sounds like a comment that speaks volumes about Berra's favor with the
Gods of social good fortune.]
These characters, real people who were
also creations of the baseball business and collaborating
sportswriters and broadcasters, helped create and perpetuate the
sentimental feelings people have towards the game. Along with
“baseball lore” and sports pieces “recalling” decades-old
games and characters and “legends” (perhaps literally legend),
all this has created a cloud of sentimentality around
professional baseball, which attracts people, cements fan loyalty,
and manufactures an ersatz community. Hence you see
people wearing baseball caps on city streets to proclaim their local
loyalty and give themselves a feeling of belonging, even
though they actually exist in a state of alienation in an
atomized urban environment. (I have been observing this
first-hand for decades, just by watching. You can see a lot that
way.) But all theyre really doing is consuming an
entertainment product (while politicians pick our pockets to buy
billion dollar stadiums for billionaire team owners).
And distracting yourself from the
important business of politics and economics and the structure of the
society you live in.
But hey, go ahead and kick back and
watch a game. Nothing wrong with entertainment and leisure, in
moderation. Promoting obsession with sports- that is, not with
playing or genuinely participating, but with voyeuristic spectating-
is the business of ESPN, “sports” radio yak shows, the sports
sections of newspapers and sports mags like Sports Illustrated.
There's a huge and profitable industry around sports in general,
which also serves a political function of distraction and
neutralization of a large part of the populace.
“A
lot of guys go, 'Hey, Yog, say a Yogi-ism.' I tell 'em, 'I don't know
any.' They want me to make one up. I don't make 'em up. I don't even
know when I say it. They're the truth. And it is the truth. I don't
know.”
I
checked three sites for quotes, and all had the same 50 ones, only in
different orders. Which adds to evidence that “Yogi Berra” wasn't just
an actual person, but a media concoction.
There isn't even consensus on how tall he was- a basic fact. A commentator who's “met him a million times” says he was 5'7”. Elsewhere his height is cited as 5'8”.
Keep in mind that much sports commentary and lore is literally legendary, plus U.S. media is generally unreliable.
The rightwing tabloid rag New York Daily News,
owned by Canadian Jewish real estate billionaire and ardent Zionist
propagandist Mortimer B. Zuckerman grouped the quotes by topic, and has a
timeline of Berra's life and career. “Yogi Berra's most famous quotes: The wit and wisdom of the late Yankees legend.”
For the same (but fewer) quotes, with the addition of quotes by other ballplayers about Berra, see “Yogi Berra Quotes,” Baseball Almanac.
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